Saying ‘NO’ is a Good Thing?

Yeah it is. For someone who has a hard time telling people “no” in fear of disappointing them and trying to make everyone like them, saying “no” can set them free. I find myself stressed and overwhelmed ALL THE TIME. Trying to be everyone’s friend, and making sure you don’t disappoint everyone you care about gets exhausting. This is not a “poor me” idea when I say this. For many years, I have allowed myself to be doormat to other peoples’ needs instead of my own. Another thing I struggle with is not wanting to fall short of my friends and familys expectations of me. I know a lot of people who go through the same mental blocks as these two problems that go hand in hand. I tend to run away from confrontation even if I know what the right thing to do is because I don’t want to cause trouble between people.

Here comes trouble. I believe you can only be your best self when you take the time to truly better yourself. When you’re always too tired to do whats good for you, you can’t be good to others. It’s MY fault that I’m always overwhelmed. I choose to say “yes” to people’s needs when they ask for help. I always wish I could have just a BIT of the attitude some of the kids in my class have towards life. The “I don’t care” or “screw everything, I’m too tired” kinda outlook on life. HA, not really, but hopefully you get the picture. Getting overworked about everything, and adopting other people’s problems as your own aren’t beneficial in the long run. Not even short term in my experience. My challenge for myself…SAY NO. A two letter word can leave you feeling 100 times less worked up. I hope my mom reads this, because I got this “people pleaser” nickname from her. We’re in this together mom<3

The fear of saying ‘no’ stems from past rejections. The people who mean the most in my life understand me. The few times I have expressed how I can’t do something to meet a deadline, they respect my feelings. The connecting piece is the idea that people who I’m not as close with may or may not understand. That’s my fear. To be a better me, I’m realizing I can’t let that be my downfall. As a person who claims to not be one to let other people’s opinions bother me, this isn’t helping that image. In 2 Timothy 1-7, it states “For the Spirit God gave us not the spirit of fear, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.” I must keep reminding myself that this chained down feeling I have felt for the longest time, is not from Him. I’m not allowing Him to fulfill His promise to me. My first ‘no’ will be to this evil voice in my head I keep allowing to scare me.img_8485I really have no upper body strength so this picture doesn’t really help my case<3

 

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